I have a lot of random things I'd love to tell you, but I don't want to bore you, so I'm going to make it in a list form so everything is more condensed.

• Thanksgiving. I can't even explain the pain Thanksgiving gave me. I didn't eat the day before in hopes that it'd help me feel better about eating so much, but it didn't help at alllll. I didn't even eat that much for me, and I still felt like such a pig. A big, fat, horrible pig. I felt like a big ball of blubber that needed to go run 5 miles. And I almost had a full on panic attack when I heard my gym was closed for the break. I need to go to the gym. It's killing me.
• Black Friday- I had SO much fun. My best friend and I woke up at 4 and went to the mall. I got some amazing things and at such great prices! (haul soon :] )
• I have lost 3 pounds. I know I should be trying to recover and everything, but when I discovered that I got SO happy. I was so enlightened in the fact that I've just become even thinner AFTER Thanksgiving. I'm not really sure where I stand on recovery anymore...

My friend and I had a photoshoot a few weeks ago and I just received the proofs from it! I thought I'd share a few....

I hope you all's Thanksgiving was great! 

xoxo

nicole.

Hi everyone!

I'd like to thank you all for staying with me and hopefully not forgetting about me! If you're reading this, thank you. My apologies for not posting this sooner, life has certainly taken a turn on me recently and this blog is about to completely change its dynamics.

High school has been a rollercoaster of events for me. I've been doing a lot more photos, and my image has become an obsession for me. You could say I'm on the search for perfection when I very well know that perfect is far from what I've become, but rather a big disoriented mess.

                                              A recent photo with a friend. (I'm on the right)


I've found myself journaling my feelings and thoughts a lot lately, and this blog seems like the perfect place to put my voice out there. Think of it as a cry for help in disguise. I've been allowing myself to forget everything and party just a little bit too hard in hopes that the need for perfection will diminish forever. So far, my pitiful attempts have failed, as they obviously should.

This is a goodbye to all of those that have followed me strictly for the fashion/diy things, and a warm welcome to those that are here for the long run, and are eager to see the path of recovery begin. I will be posting my meals and fitness habits more than anything. A lot of ramblings are to be expected as well. The cheap teenager that spends too much money at thrift stores is definitely NOT planning on leaving anytime soon, you bet I'll have fashion-y things here and there, it's just not my main focus at the time.

                                           Me and my friends at homecoming, I'm on the right.


Every day brings a new story for me, it'd be an honor if you'd join me and read along as a evolve. I'm not necessarily ready for recovery quite yet, the time will come.